Wait...

I've often wondered about the emotions Jesus' disciples went through after the crucifixion, the fear, guilt for some, disappointment, the doubting, I imagine they experienced 3 days of it all.  But the joy after His resurrection must have been indescribable, the comfort during the 40 days of teaching before He ascended into Heaven, the unbridled enthusiasm of wanting to tell the world...all of these, some of them at once I'm sure.    

In Acts 1, we read that Jesus gives some final instructions before He is taken into Heaven.  He said to the Apostles in Acts 1:4, "Do not leave Jerusalem, but WAIT for the gift my Father promised..."  

Now we know today that the gift that Jesus was referring to was 2 fold, 1) the special outpouring on the Apostles that gave miraculous powers to those 12 and 2) the indwelling gift of the Holy Spirit received at baptism.  

But there's something deeper for us to get from this today as well, not anything earth shattering of Gospel changing, as I'm not about to do that (see Galatians 1:8).  But sometimes, God just needs us to wait.  For us to learn, to listen, to pray, to be prepared.  

That even though we want to go and do, we need to stay and grow.  As a youth minister I'm very privileged to teach and lead some amazing students, several of whom have already committed themselves to overseas missions, and if they had the chance, they'd leave today.  But it's just not their time yet, there's work for ahead of them, preparing them for what's coming up, and there's work for them to do here, leading and teaching other students and even their families.  

Many times we need to wait, but let this not be an excuse to not do the things Jesus commissioned us to do while we are waiting, teaching and baptizing others, that's ALL of our jobs at all times.  

But for you, what do you need?  What are you waiting for?  And more importantly, how are you pursuing what you lack?    

Something New

Of course the picture here has nothing to do with being new, in fact, it's from the 1984 movie "Breakin 2."  But I guess when you think about it, was new in 1984.  

Go ahead, look at the picture again and laugh...

There's been something that's been on my mind for a while, for a few years actually, and it's something that I've been trying to figure out what it should look like today.  Something that all Christians want to be a part of, but I'm convinced that few, me included, actually get.  Sure, some are further along than others, but in all honesty, it seems that most don't really care or have a clue.  

What I'm talking about is being a true New Testament Christian, being a part of the Church (with the big 'C') that is described in Acts.  That sounds like fun doesn't it?  

So, this is what we're going to do, we're going to go through Acts and check out words that stand out to me, ways that we can live and be the Church of Christ.  

First and for most, you cannot be apart of the Church without accepting Christ, in case you were wondering.  Second of all, what this comes down to is an overused word...LOVE.  It comes down to the greatest command, loving God and loving others, if we do these things, following God is not an issue and helping others is also not an issue, we just do it because we WANT to.  

So as we go through this journey (haha overused church buzz word) together, there will be days that I will randomly do write something else, and also this won't happen everyday, so keep checking in.  

So let's get started, our first word is found in the first verse of the first chapter and it's simply, 'began.'  "I (Luke) wrote about all that Jesus BEGAN..."  

This word BEGAN is the key to the entire book and the entire Church that we are now a part of.  This word BEGAN joins us to Jesus' work.  

I know for me, 2000+ years is a long time ago, it seems so far away that it's almost untouchable, until you view Acts and Jesus' work through the word BEGAN. Jesus' work did not end when He left, Jesus' work is not for others who are long dead, Jesus' work is for us today, it BEGAN with him, and it ends when He returns.  In the mean time, it's up to us to do the things He BEGAN.

What are those things?  So in being the church today, we need to understand and realize that we are part of this beginning, we have a role in this situation, we are involved and connected to Jesus' ministry.

It's been a while...

I know I'm not the only one, but sometimes you just don't feel like doing something, and I haven't really felt like blogging for a while, which makes me think, 'what else do I not feel like doing?'  So, here's a list...

1) Showering.  I know, I know, and yes I do everyday (except for Shower Free Thursdays).  But I have grown to hate being wet, I hate swimming, I hate water hoses, I hate rain, and I do not enjoy taking a shower.  To me it seems like such a waste of time, it's just an annoying necessary evil I suppose.

2) Getting gas.  I hate having to stop what I'm doing or where I'm going to feel up the gas tank, it just takes me away from what I feel like I should be doing, which is moving toward my destination.

3) Mowing my stupid yard.  It doesn't get much lower on the totem pole for me folks, I hate my yard, I hate grass, I hate having to take the time to mow my grass.  

4) Spanking my kids.  My first question to myself is why do they have to do something in order to be spanked?  Why, why, why?  But it doesn't matter, it has to be done otherwise they'd go plumb wild.  

5) Getting up in the mornings.  It's no secret to those who know me, I'm a night person, not a morning person.  But in order to be a 'responsible adult' one HAS to get up in the mornings.  

But in all honesty, I could go on and on and on with things that I hate, but what's the point?  I mean, isn't this LIFE?  Life is full of stuff that we don't want to do, hate to do, don't want to take the time to do, but it's necessary.

For Christians, how many of us HATE to share the Gospel with the people we know?  How many of us would rather do something, or anything than go to church on Sunday?  How many of us will do anything we can to avoid the service we are called to do.  The reaching of the lost, giving of our time and money, searching for 'the least of these.'  

But just as showering is a necessary part of life, spanking is a necessary part of parenting, mowing is a necessary part of home ownership, and getting gas is part of driving (or riding), serving, telling, committing are necessary parts of Christian Life.

By the way, I picked up Mute Math's album Flesh and Bones Electric Fun and it's off the hook.  If you love music, you'll love Mute Math.

Is this Wed Night? Since it's 4:45am on Thur...

Yes, it is quarter til 5 and I'm up and have been up, but there's a good reason.

Had a very good day, actually experienced one of the most moving and powerful times I've ever had in my life.  It was a breath-taking situation, a first look into the Grand Canyon type deal.  I won't give it away so you parents can hear about it from your kids...

It's so rewarding and encouraging to work with hearts that are still malleable, that are accepting to challenge and change, that are more accepting to the idea that maybe I should be different or that it's ok to have my life rocked by God.  It's not to say that all adults in church have Pharaoh hard hearts, but let's be honest here, how often are the majority of church adults willing to allow themselves to be taught something new, challenging and different?  How willing are we as adults to have our hearts melted by God to be molded to what HE wants from us?  Oh yeah, I DO remember that when a finger is pointed then 3 is pointing right back at me, I'm included in this deal here too.  

There's something glorious about allowing ourselves to be broken by our Creator, the greatest Lover, the one who is Passionate and the One who heals.  To allow Him to say, 'Justin, I love you, but Justin, it's time.'  Time to completely let go, time to 100% buy in, time to be so radical that people think you're crazy.  Not radical for radical sake, but radical because you're in LOVE with GOD!  

I really think it's time for us as Americans, American church attenders, to rethink our reality.  To rethink what we call commitment to God, to rethink relationship and community, to rethink service.  I believe it will be hard and it will hurt, but these things usually are and do, but if the outcome is what we were intended to be in the first place, then how is that bad? 

TUES(?) night

I can never keep my days straight at these things.  We had a really good day, went to the lake and played, had a challenging night, a concert by Stellar Kart and I had girl night.  Complete with hamburgers, pedicure, beard braiding, and gas?  

God is continuing to work, so it's going to be fun to see where it goes from here.

Monday Afternoon of Jr High Challenge

WOW, zero time to blog so far...

Last night was really good and so was this morning.  The speakers are the most age appropriate speakers I've ever heard and are biblically sound, not afraid to say what needs to say in a way jr highers can understand, so it's goot! 

Most importantly, we baptized Kennedy Sallee today at 2 at the foot of a cross on a hill!!!!  She's a really amazing girl, you just have to meet her if you haven't.

THU NIGHT

Amazed, completely amazed!!!!  I'm speechless as I've never seen anything like that before in my life.

My question is, why are teens more apt to embrace certain, tough aspects of BEING the church but adults not so much?  

BTW

BtW = by the way in teen text language

the times on the bottom are Pacific, so the blogs are gettin written purty late.

Wed CIY

Wow what a powerful day!!!  We've pretty much established that here in our culture we pretty much do some things wrong in church, now don't get me wrong.  We nail some things, like baptism, but I'm beginning to think we miss it pretty big on how we hold on to stuff and think OUR desires and wants are GOD's desires and wants for our lives.  It's obvious we think we are  the center of the universe and not God, like what Jim Johnson spoke about the song 'Above All', how God thought of us Above All which is SOOOOOOO not the case, God thought of HIMSELF above all!!

And 2 more of our students thought of God above all tonight.  Paige Anderson baptized Lauren Bailes tonight at 11:15 in the creek and Alex Grigsby was also baptized into Christ as well.  WHAT A GREAT THING!!! maybe we should start supporting CIY financially as a church...

By the way, Paige brought Lauren to church and was her friend and shared Christ with her, Paige is a sophmore in high school and did what Jesus told her to do by baptizing and teaching.

What's your excuse?  Remember, it's God you'll have to answer to not me.  Too harsh?  But it's God that told us to do this, so talk to Him about it.  

Tues Night at CIY

Jeff Walling brought it tonight, he is by far my favorite preacher, sorry Lance, Mike, and Dad. 

We talked about sin and freedom and had the most powerful illustration I've ever seen on it as we shackled the kids' hands together like they were prisoners (it was wrist bands so it was all good). 

The most awesomeness of it all is Gavin Mahan and Sophia Robey were BAPTIZED tonight! Sophia was baptized by her friend Kaely Seals who just graduated high school?  So how many people have you baptized?  None?  So tell me why are you not fulfilling the Great Commission of Matthew 28?  Don't worry, it's God you'll answer to not me.  

I also got to have an amazing conversation with some students and let me tell you, we have some AWESOME ones!

It's been a great day in the Lord, now...I must sleepy.

Tues at CIY

We got in fine yesterday, not much time for me to blog.  The theme of yesterday was IDENTITY, today it's FREEDOM, so we're going to be talking about our sins today.

Girls, sex, porn, masturbation, and jr high guys?

I'm currently leading a small group for jr high guys that meets on some of the Mondays this summer, and so far, it's been very good.  The whole purpose of this small group is to encourage these guys to grow into men of God and leaders in the church.  One Monday we're going to have a man day and shoot bottle rockets and then go eat wings at Buffalo Wild Wings...har har, MEN!!!  And because they're guys, and because I'm a guy, I kind of remember what it was like.  I also remember feeling things, being told things by friends, seeing things, seeing girls at school and not having a clue what it meant or what to do about it.

But let's face it, the 5 things in the title of this blog are not something  we want to talk about together, much less 3 of them much at all.  At the same time, the truth is the truth, the world loves to push girls, sex, porn, and masturbation onto not just jr. high guys, but guys of all ages and many girls too.  

To be be honest, talking about the 'big m' to 11-13 year olds isn't the most pleasant experience for anyone, but it has to be done.  I think one of the main reasons we as a nation are in the sexual mess we are in is because 1) parents didn't/don't talk about it properly, 2) churches haven't educated/do not educate biblically about it, and 3) God is gone for many many people.  

(Do you know Jesus addressed masturbation?  Read Matthew 5:27-30 in CONTEXT of the passage.  Not only did He just address it, but He addressed it to THOUSANDS during the Sermon on the Mount.) 

Some parents will cringe at the fact that their innocent baby hears this at church, to that I say guess what?  Would you rather them hear about it at school from a friend or a big brother or from you or the church?  

I know it's uncomfortable, I know it's awkward, I know it's hard, but we have to be real.  We all know that guys are going to figure out how it works on their own eventually, so we need to teach what the Bible says about it and the dangers that come alone with porn, laker girls, and dance squads, which are lighter versions of porn. 

We need to educate our kids how to live in a sex saturated world so they can get through it and have a wonderful marriage to the girl of their dreams (and their dreams have nothing to do with big boobs, but everything to do with Christ, respect, and relationship.)

We also need to go ahead and teach forgiveness, because they will fail and guess what, so will I.  Yes, I will fail too, but my love and passion for Christ sustains me, forgives me, and empowers me to avoid and grow from mistakes. 

I also realize that my time is coming soon with my son, to have 'the talk,' and I'll just have to blog about that soon.  

How many do we need?

  This past week I got to spend Tues to Monday with my wife in Panama City Beach, Fl, and let me tell you, it was needed and it was wonderful.  We went to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary and actually went without our kids.  We hung out, talked, made some decisions on some real important things and mainly just relaxed and chilled.  On the way down we stopped and spent the night with some good friends in Atlanta and even went to a Hillsong United worship concert, but there's more to come with that later. 

   Now, it is a well documented fact that I despise, loath, admonish, give angry eyebrows to, can't stand, and hate country music and the country music culture.  (I'll give you Keith Urban, but that's it.)  To me it is the most wretched genre of music, all the whining about being drunk or heart broken, all the fake-christianity (you know, drink lots of beer, have sex, play poker on Sat night, but dog-gone-it, you better be in church Sun morning!), Montgomery-Gentry, cowboy boots, singing out of the side of the mouth, not writing their own songs, and of course, Montgomery-Gentry.  

But as we drove through KY, TN, GA, AL, FL, then a different way back through FL, AL, TN, and KY, I noticed something VERY troubling.  I mean how many flipping country stations do we need people?!?  Seriously?  There was nothing but country the entire way!  There was new country, mixed country, old country, Nashville country, California country, horse country, city country, Taylor Swift country, and let me tell you, it all sucked!!!  Station after station after station of COUNTRY!!!  Can I get a little U2?  How about some David Crowder*Band?  At least hook me up with some 'Freebird.'  Good grief!!!  Do people actually change from country station to country station?  What are they looking for?  I can hear them now, 'Oh, this song isn't sad enough, let's go to the next country station.'  'Oh, my dog was ran over 35 years ago, let's find a song about that.'  And they'd find it too, because it's on there somewhere, you know it has to be on there somewhere.  

  But the more I thought of it, the more it related to something else that really bothers me.  The fact that there are so many different 'churches' in our society.  The fact that my little town of 18,000 had 83 churches in the city limits.  The fact that the large mega-church 30 miles away has to cater to it's lazy people and put a 'satelite' in Danville, because "no one is doing anything" and they want to "chase the lion out of Danville."  (Those are actual quotes, and the only biblical description of 'lion' in Scripture is referring to Jesus, and I really don't want Jesus chased out of Danville.)  

  The fact that people pick and choose their flavor or what feels right and sounds good to them offends me and I can't imagine what we do to God with our attitude toward Church.  That our own local congregation is OURS DANGIT!!!  I love those chairs, you can't change them!!!  I don't want different things!!!!  This just doesn't fit my style or who I am, so I'm going to look someplace else!  I'm MAAAD, I'M LEAVING!!!!  THIS PLACE SUCKS!!!  I'M FINDING SOMEPLACE ELSE!!!

  Of course, because we read through the New Testament and that's exactly the church isn't it?  People shopped around to find the place that fit them best didn't they or to 'meet their own needs.'  

  Oh yeah, of course doctrine doesn't matter either, believe what ever you want about God's Word, it doesn't matter, because we all know the SINNER'S PRAYER is found in Scripture somewhere and even though the Bible tells us to be baptized, it doesn't matter...right?   

  Our society is so me focused, we have to have a bazillion country stations because of that, and honestly, there's nothing wrong with that.  But there sure as heck is something wrong with having a bazillion churches in the same place teaching a bazillion different theologies even though Scripture tells us God is unchanging.  We also have to have a large church bring something in because people throw fits because of the commute?  

  AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT SEES SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS?!?!  THIS IS NOT THE CHURCH WE READ ABOUT IT ACTS!!! 

  I'm so fearful that so many people will stand before God and the same thing will happen to them as Jesus described in Matthew 7, when God tells people who thought they were following God, 'away from me, I never knew you.'

  That passage scares me to death, that's why I choose to follow God's Word and do the best I can, not that I'm perfect, but I'm sure trying, not because works save me, but because I simply am in love with Jesus.  

   It's time to stop this crap and start following God's way and God's Word.  

motorcycles at night

There's something mysterious about riding a motorcycle late at night.  Not riding it around in the city, but out in the country, under the stars, away from the lights of the city and other cars.  It's a feeling of alone that you don't get very often and I don't mean that in a bad way (like in the type of 'alone' that was my high school career).  But it's just you, a bike, and the road.  

I was out real late the other night on a 2 lane road way out in the country, and I noticed something.  There was a weird movement in my visor and it took me a second to figure out what I was looking at.  See, the light of my head light caused a reflection on the inside of my helmet's visor, and when I figured it out, it was my own eyes that I was seeing.  I literally had to look through the reflection of my eyes in my visor to see the road.  I thought that was very weird, weird that I was looking at myself and into my own eyes, and it made me think.  It made me think that sometimes I really don't like what's on the other side of them.  

That sometimes selfish and pride are staring right back at me.  That holding on to past hurts, struggles and anger keep peering at me and they just won't go away.  I didn't like having to look into my own eyes that night, I didn't like the fact of peeking at my own soul and personality was something that was brought on.  I wanted to flip up my visor, but that visor protected me from the wind and the torrent of bugs that were assaulting me.  I needed the visor, I needed what it was made for, so I could see and be safe.  

We need to investigate ourselves, we need to peer into our own lives, motives, judgements, and salvation.  We need the Word of God to be our visor, our protector, our windshield, our tool to truth and our souls.  We need to spend time peering into these things, pondering the things we could do better and taking comfort in the things we are doing right.  We need reflection.  

Please take time this week and reflect, take time this week to investigate your own soul and where you stand based upon the truth found in the Word of God.  Take time to peer, take time to search and if you can...take time to ride a motorcycle.   

A couple of years ago we decided to pony up $200 or so and buy one of those Hoover carpet cleaners, and let me tell you, it's been worth every penny.  

Here's the thing, I don't really consider us dirty people.  Sloppy?  Sure.  Dirty?  No.  I mean, I personally tend to tip the scale on the side of 'pretty disgusting individual,'  but as a whole, I'd like to think we're fairly clean folks.  

With that being said, all I have to say is if you clean you're own carpet, then nothing and I mean NOTHING will make you feel more disgusting than when you empty the container of the used water out.  It is nothing but lower Mississippi River water and it makes you wonder how in the world could your carpet be so dirty?  

But it's easy actually when you think about it.  There's 4 of us in our household and we are in and out all day long.  Walking in the grass, down the road, at school, at work, in the car, in the yard, in the store, you name it, where on it.  Just think of all the stuff that attaches to the bottom of our shoes, all the dirt and grime that is tracked in from the outside world, all the junk, the undesirable dirt.  

But isn't that like our hearts?  We have the opportunity to purify ourselves from the outside world, and God allows us to do so.  Once we have He no longer sees our sins, but there are consequences for our choices and our actions. 

Many times we track things inside of us, we walk through a song, a tv show, something online, or a thought and we track the things we want out right back in.  Heck, sometimes we straight up walk through the cow pasture looking for things to step in, and when we find them, we roll in them.  We allow ourselves to be consumed and dirtied by the desires of our hearts and the shiny things of the world.  

But yet God is steadfast, cleaning us, as 1 John tells us, continuing to purify us from our sins, our unrighteousness, from the things we track into our hearts.  

Because of this, isn't it time to live up to our end of the relationship?  Isn't it time we pursue the things of God and avoid the dirt and grim?  Of course we'll never ever be perfect, in fact, God has never said or demanded we be perfect.  But God does require our very best effort and because of this free GIFT of grace and mercy, it's time to avoid those things that soil us.  

So may God lead you and guide you through times of temptation and frustration this week at home, work, or school.  May we have a week with clean carpets.  

what does that have to do with anything?

This is my friend.  Yeah, I know it's not a huge Harley and is only a 750cc Honda, but I love it!  For one because it isn't a Harley Davidson therefore it won't breakdown on me constantly, but mainly because it brings me great joy and great relief from stress.  With this it's the one thing that has ever made me 'semi-cool' I suppose.    

It also means so much to me because it was given to me by people that I love very dearly, a gift just because, a gift that I wouldn't change, well...except for new pipes someday.  I have enjoyed this bike so much that I've put over 5000 miles on it in less than a year.  That's a lot of miles for a bike considering it pretty much sat covered by a tarp from November to March.  

So here's this gift, this thing that someone gave me that brings me joy and comfort.  A gift that saves me money on gas, a gift that makes me look better, a gift that gives me yet one more reason to grow my goatee really long.  A gift that makes me realize that I really don't deserve something like this, trust me.  

Earlier today I was washing my gift, because I've never had a nice new car and this is literally the only thing I've owned that's worth keeping up, and it was covered with bugs because like I said, I ride the crap out of it.  Anyway, I was washing it today and I don't know if you've ever tried to wash a motorcycle but it's not very easy.  There's all the nooks and crannies, all the different parts, and all the wonderful chrome, add all that up and it takes quite a while.  

But after I was done washing my gift and polishing all the chrome, I stood back and looked at it.  Right there I realized that it was worth the time and effort to wash it, it was worth the energy to polish it right and to make it gleam.  It was worth it because I really, really like my gift.  It was worth it because someone gave that to me and without saying I owe it to them to keep it up nice, keeping it nice shows my appreciation and care for my gift. 

Right there I realized that my gift isn't unlike my free gift of grace from God.  That because He did what He did for me, I love Him for that.  And I am so thankful for what He did for me, that my outpouring of thankfulness and love for God's gift makes me want to polish it.  Makes me want to spend time on it, makes me want to keep it from places that will soil it.  

I realized that as hard as it is to keep my bike clean, it's harder to keep myself clean and pure.  It's harder to keep my desires from interfering with this love relationship that I have with my Creator and I have to work at keeping my Gift pure, polished, and to maintain its growth.  

So many of us believe that to have a relationship with Christ is to accept Him, attend church or at least an Easter service and we're good.  But if you believe, if I believe that all of this is real, don't you think it's worth our time to polish and clean?  Don't you think it's worth our effort to keep our minds and hearts pure?  Don't you think it's worth pursuing with all that we have?  I mean if this is real, it's God and that leaves us with 2 choices...all or nothing.  

I'm so thankful for my Gift from God and for what He has done, is doing, and will do in my life.  I'm also very thankful for my friends that have brought me so much joy from their gift to me.  

best i can

Have you ever heard a song and just have it kick you right in the heart?  Like wow, that song is just all about me right now and it's...just inspiring.  

Certain songs through my life really stick out to me, some because of what they say, others because of the time period of my life that was defined by the song.  Songs like 'Where the Streets have No Name' by U2, 'What if' by Matt McCoy, 'Walking in Memphis' by Marc Cohn, 'Sweet Child O' Mine' by Guns n Roses, anything off of Def Leppard's Hysteria album, 'Evenflow' by Pearl Jam, Audio Adrenaline's 'Big House' and 'Bag Lady,' 'Meet with Me' from Ten Shekel Shirt, 'Beautiful Collision' by David Crowder Band and 

'Dancing Queen' by ABBA...oh...did I say that out loud?  

The other day I received a copy of Decyfer Down's new album 'Crash.'  Decyfer Down is a band from Morehead City, NC and I'd describe them as 80's hair metal crashed into Soundgarden plus modernity.  Needless to say, I loved them right off the bat.  

But they have a song that got me, a song that describes where I feel I am right now.   The song is called best I can and here are some of the lyrics...

Been thinking about
All those lies you heard me say
I can't make them go away
Been thinking about 
All those mistakes you've seen me make

When I can barely hold on 
You promise me you won't let me go 
And I want you to know

I don't live a perfect life
But God knows I'm trying the best I can
And I have wasted so much time
Pretending I'm alright about who I am
But now I'm living the best I can

Been thinking about
It's hard to see what you see in me
Would you lay it out for me?
Been thinking about
This isn't the way I thought I would be

When I can barely hold on 
You promise me you won't let me go 
And I want you to know

I don't live a perfect life
But God knows I'm trying the best I can
And I have wasted so much time
Pretending I'm alright about who I am
But now I'm living the best I can

Oh yeah I know, I'm supposed to have everything together right?  To that I'm saying, I'm trying, I'm a work in progress too.  

All of us are works in progress...works in progresses...workses is progressionses...you know what I mean.  We are all either on  some point in the same journey or are still at the starting line yet to start, with others who have fallen off the path.  God never expected Christians to be amazingly perfect once we accepted His Son, BUT He does expect that we live the for Him, that we make progress, that we do the best we can.  That we seek Him, His will, His lifestyle, His glory through what we are doing and how we are living. 

Through all the times and all the mistakes I have made and will make, I know there's grace and I'm so thankful for that.  I know there's healing and restoration and I'm so thankful for that.  I know there's love and compassion and I'm so thankful for that.  But because of that, there has to be a response with our lives.  Our response has to be, at worst, to do the best we can, to grow, to learn, to change.   

Are you doing the best you can?  Why don't you join me as a work in progress, we'll get there...

helpless?

I'll admit it, I've felt pretty helpless more than once in my life.  There's times when I wish I could open my Mac and it had a help button to get me through decisions and the things that I'm not sure are going to work out.  

I can remember being 9 years old and riding my bike down a long steep hill, at the bottom of the hill were 2 choices (because stopping isn't a choice to a 9 year old boy of course) 1) keep going straight into the busiest road in Jackson, TN; 0r 2) turn right at the bottom of the hill.  I chose number 2 of course but there was no way I was making the turn, so instead of washing out or making it, I hit the curb going very fast causing me to flip over and over ultimately landing on my face.  I bloodied my nose, bent up my bike, hurt my pride, but I was otherwise ok.  

I remember when I was 12, my best friends mom was murdered.  She was straight up shot in the head while she was in bed.  He called me when he found out crying, saying his mom was dead, his mom was dead, that she was shot.  Like any good friend, at first I didn't believe him, but it didn't take long for me to realize he wasn't playing.  Now what does a 7th grader do, sitting in his room on the phone with his best friend on the other line crying uncontrollably about his murdered mom?  I remember sitting there listening to him sob and sob and sob and sob for about an hour.  Every so often I'd say, 'I'm so sorry,' but I  was helpless and he was my best friend.  There was nothing I could say or nothing I could do, but sit there...sit there with him on the phone. 

So many times people see something and it hurts them, or their hearts are in line with God's heart and the very thing that hurts God also hurts them.  But most choose to do...nothing.  

I've thought often about that night on the phone with my best friend for the last 20 years, and I realize I did about the only thing I could have at the time.  That was listen and being there, and don't get me wrong and think that I was some super mature Christ-loving kid at that time because my life was anything but Christ-loving until I was about 20.  The only reason I stayed with him was because I simply didn't know what else to do, and he needed someone to be there. I guess I should have made my parents take me to his house, I guess I should have had him come over, but I just listened.

Do you have those situations?  Do you look out at this world and become pained by the things you see, the people you come in contact with?  Is it enough to hurt for them and do nothing?  I don't think it is enough.  

We are called to do something, to live outside of our own little houses with leaky roofs, we are called to try, even if we don't know what to do.  Sometimes us just being there is enough to start with, sometimes the situation calls for more.  

But I just don't want to go through my life working without reaching out to others, without bringing the Remedy to those who are hurt.  Even if we don't have the words, even if we don't know what to do, simply try.

Football, poopie pants, bumper cars, and cracks...

Today was supposed to be THE perfect day, and it was great, but I'm a negative nelly so I let stuff overshadow reality.  Let me explain...

Today was MAN DAY, a day when my 6 year old son, Zeke and I planned to go to the Blue/White football game at the University of Kentucky.  He had a soccer game this morning, then after that we were going to jet off to Lexington, but things came unglued from the get go.  

Zeke is actually really good at soccer, and this isn't dad talk, I personally despise the wretched sport but he is like...good.  I mean, he's scored 8 goals in his first 3 games good and the coach said he should play with the older age group good.  Which is strange because Gillespies tend to be 'ok' or at best above average at a sport.  But I missed the first part of his game due to issues that came up inside my body from last nights dinner (this is foreshadowing by the way).  But hey, we can over come that.

So before I get to the bad parts of the day, let me give you a recap of the great parts of the day, and it was great.  We had a blast at Commonwealth Stadium!!!  I actually heard Micah Johnson, UK's stud linebacker, yell boom before he lit up a running back, it was so cool.  I also was able to get fairly close to Coach Calipari and Patrick Patterson before they were whisked away, but that's ok too.  

Zeke and I watched trains, we came home and played basketball outside (he won 102-95), we mowed the yard, which is awesome because he gets an old stroller, puts his ipod on like me and goes behind me as I'm mowing.  Then, to top it off, we played catch until dark when mean ol' mommy made us come inside.  So you can see the awesomeness that was my day, now for the parts that I can't shake. 

1) Remember my hinting of my meal last night?  Well...I pooped my pants when we got into Lexington.  Yes...I did.  Now before you make fun of me...you've done it too so shuttie.  Normally that would be funny to me, but not so much today.  I mean it was me and Zeke, and we were being boys and doing boy things and trying to gross each other out and all, then I had a 'toot' that wasn't what it lead my brain to believe it was...

2) I rear ended a brand spanking new Toyota Camery on our way into Commonwealth Stadium.  I hit it pretty hard and they had a little kid in the car too, it really was bad.  I expected the people to come pouring out of the car and I decided I was just going to take it.  But they were cool, no police called, just exchanged info.  I put a dent in the bumper and shoved the nose of my car back into the rest of it, so now I can't get my hood open.  So just add that to the electrical problems that have claimed my turn signals and randomly lights up my dash and causes my tape player (yes, tape player) to rewind.  And add it to my window that stays up with zip ties, my cracked heater core, driver door that's coming apart, heater fan that works when it feels like it, and rear door that CRACKLES when it is opened and closed.  So I'm expecting the call anytime now...

3) One of my most used possessions is my i-pod, I use it all the time for all kinds of things and situations, well...after the poo and after the crash, I dropped it and put many cracks in the screen.  These cracks aren't on the outside of the screen either, they're on the inside.  But hey, it still works so we shall soldier on.  

Notice how things like this happens, we have something awesome and wonderful planned, but then crap happens.  Then we, or I, focus on the negatives, rather than the positives.  Poop cleans, no one was hurt in the other car or mine, and ipods aren't anything.  But the day I had with my son will hopefully be forever.  

Jesus promised us 2 things in John 16:33: 1) In this world we WILL have trouble.  2) Take heart HE has overcome the world.  

He's here, He's the remedy, He desires us, He will provide and He will protect if we allow Him to do these things for us.  

May your Sunday and work week be filled with joy even though your pants are full of...well...not joy...

Compassion, Horses, and Earth Day

There's a couple of things that have really struck me in an awkward way here recently.

1) Earth Day: Now I'll have to admit that I've never been too fond of the 'holiday' or it's meaning.  The celebration of the creation is just not something that I think to highly of as a follower of Christ.  Why in the world (haha, get it?) would we waste our time?  

  Now don't get me wrong, I am a firm believer in taking care of and being a good steward to the resources we have been given by God to use.  I am a supporter of recycling materials.  I am a supporter of alternate means of energy other than oil for many reasons.  I am also a supporter of conservation in the saving of land and taking care of animals, BUT, there has to be some common sense.  

   Take the whales and polar bears and their possible extinction.  In Matthew 10, Jesus was teaching about the importance of people and the importance of people living for Him and being focused on Him.  He was also teaching us to not worry about those who can hurt us when we are doing His work.  Yes, He lets us know it's hard, but the focus is, 'He is more important.'  In vs. 29-31 He says...

  "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?  yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.  And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  So don't be afraid, you are worth more than many sparrows."

  Of course the context of this entire chapter is the importance of people and basically the focus of where people should be.  However, we can learn that God is aware of when any animal dies and specifically, their deaths are in the will of the Father.  God knew when and why all of the T-Rex's died.  God was there for the dodo birds.  God chose to let the wooley mammoths die out as well.

  For those of us with bleeding hearts we say, "That's cruel, what kind of God does that?"  To that I say, one that knows what He's doing.  If the Blue Whale and the Polar Bear become extinct, it will not be apart from the will of the Father.  

  If we believe that God has done all He has done and is as powerful as He is, then I'm certain He will take care of His creation.  

2) This week 21 polo horses in Florida died a mysterious death as a result of supplements that were mixed wrong.  Because I live outside of "The Horse Capital of the World," Lexington, KY, people are going crazy.  Crying, having memorial services, clamoring for justice for these horses and wanting to get to the bottom of their deaths.  The outrage for this is amazing!!!

  This saddens me greatly, not the death of the horses, sure, it's bad, but where's the outrage toward injustice of people?  Where's the outrage to human sex trafficking?  Where's the outrage for hungry children?  Where's the outrage toward abortion?  Where's the outrage to abuse?  Why are these people wanting to get to the bottom of this issue, but is not concerned that there are people all over the world in poverty?  How come vet clinics have ultra-sound machines but clinics for people all over the world do not?  

  There is definitely something wrong here.  God had given us tremendous opportunities to share His will, but we waste so much time and so many resources on so many things that do not really matter.  It's time to stop wasting what matters, a chance to share the Gospel, a chance to save a live, a chance for God to make your life count.  

Maybe start here, we have...  www.compassion.com 

Home :)

Great week, now we're home.  Thanks for all the prayers, I'll be blogging about some of the adventures soon.

Sat morning

Finished cleaning the building, we go and tutor 3rd and 4th graders at the public school from 10am-12am.  The 'PLAN,' and I use that term loosely, is to be on the road by 12:30 and stop in Lex for lunch, then home.  

Ask your youngins to tell you allllll about it.

Fri Night

Um....I need some dynamite please.  It's pretty much the only way I'm getting your kids out of here tomorrow.

Fri Late Afternoon

We're pretty much done, just have to clean things and we'll be good to go.  They worked really well today and at about 2:30 we all went to the park to play with the kids and everyone played with the kids until we got rained out at about 4:30.  Why yes, we all DID get soaked.  

I do have to brag on our girl Kim again today, she was walking up to any kid and parent possible at the park and inviting them to church tonight...amazing.  Khaki and Christina went with one of the State Ave Church folks to walk kids home and meet their parents.  

Right now we are all preparing for dinner, then church, our devos, and SHOWERS!!!

Everyone is still amazed by last night....wow!!! 

Thursday Night

WOW, what just happened?  Oh yeah...God just moved. 

Thursday Afternoon

Adam took Kim, little Justin, Andy, Tyler, Rachel, and Michaela to the school for mentoring and all of them were dominated in Scrabble for the most part.  The rest of us stayed at the State Ave Church to work finishing some various projects.  Khaki, Christina, Heath, and Ty grouted in the kitchen.  Lori, Hunter, Jonathan, Gavin and Caitlin finished mudding drywall.  Kenzie, Nate, Wes, and Kaely finished the office (laid lamenant and painted).   Kaitie and Ethan routed those little wood thingys to go around the floorboard and the rest of us cleaned, cleaned tools, and carried them all down four flights of stairs to the trailer and that was all done before 11am.

At 11:30 we left for the Reds game, in which they won 8 - 6, so that's great!!! Also we kind of upgraded our $7 upper deck tickets to right on the field down the 3rd base line.  

Right now it's 4:30 and we're chillin until LaRossa's pizza gets here, then it's church for the kids of the neighborhood.  

Also, we may be home a little later on Saturday as well, more like 4 or later.  The people in charge of the mentoring program (a public school no less) have asked if we could stay for a special 2 hour mentoring program on Sat. from 10-12.  A fun fact of this situation is that the school was VERY apprehensive about letting 'high school students from Kentucky' participate in this program.  Yesterday we were requested to stay for the longer session on Saturday, so that speaks well.  

Thursday Morning

A group goes to mentor this morning, then it's off to the Reds game, will blog more later.

Our worship leader had to go home, so I'm off the bench for tonight.  

Wed afternoon

Gonna have to be a quick one today, no time to check spelling either.

Best day yet, we worked hard and played HARDER!!!!  I took Lori, Tina, Wes, Nate, Jonathan, and Paige to the school to mentor.  We helped them with reading and part of what that meant was that we played Scrabble.  AND YES, I WAS OWNED BY A 3RD and a 4TH GRADER!!!!  Stupid 'q' and 'z' being worth 10 points each.  It was great.  

Also we Kaitie, Ty, Ethan, Nick, Paige, Alex, Kim, Andy, Tyler, Rachel, Little Justin, Michaela and myself went to the park to start up some games.  We played basketball, double dutch (yes, I suck at it, embarrassing actually) and kick ball and the neighborhood kids and some adults came out of the wood work, it was loads of fun.  

Let me tell, you should be VERY proud of your kids today!!!!  Especially those who went to the park.  

Tuesday Afternoon

Well Day 2 of work is done and it wasn't the easiest way, you know, laying lamenant (and no, I cannot spell that word) flooring and dry walling a ceiling isn't actually the easiest thing to do.  Some of us finished the rooms at the community center today and organized their library, so that was fun.  

Kenzie, Heath, Gavin, Alex, Hunter, and Caitlin Camic went to mentor at the school and had a great time.  Everyone who plays scrabble with these kids is absolutely getting owned by them.  I'm not laughing too hard because it's my turn tomorrow.  Some of them have said that the hour with the kids in the school feels like 15 min.  

Also last night was great, Kim, Rachel, Alex, Ty, and Michaela lead the neighborhood kids in a service last night about what Jesus was doing on Monday before His crucifixion and they did an AWESOME job.  I'm very proud of them and also most of our students came down and sang and played with the kids, so it was a good thing.  

Tonight Nate, Nick, Jonathan, and Heath have it tonight, so we're ready.  

It's Tuesday, which is the day that everyone realizes, 'Hey, I'm actually kind of tired.'  But, today has gone by pretty  fast for some and slow for others.  Soooooo...tomorrow we shall see...

Monday Afternoon...

Well, we are juuuuust about done with physical work for the day and we've gotten a whole lot accomplished.  We also took a tour of the neighborhood and I found out that Rich Mullins lived here at State Ave for a while, I'm a huge Rich fan so that's really, really cool.  

Adam took Nick, Ty, Kaitie, Ethan, and Christian to the public school down the street to do some tutoring with 3rd and 4th grade kids.  It was funny, Nick was absolutely OWNED at scrabble by a fourth grader and no we are not letting him forget it.  

I took Justin W, Kenzie, Caitlin C, Kim, and Michaela to the community center that State Ave uses for their church services and we painted all day.  Of course Kenzie and Kim declared war on me for some reason and so far, they are losing like Gen. Custer  at Little Big Horn.  Our group also made lunch today too, mmmm, PB and J for all.  

Tereasa stayed at the church building with everybody else along with the Crossroads staff and the State Ave folks.  Some are in the process of laying a new floor, which is entertaining to watch because it's a bear, others carried drywall sheets up four floors worth of stairs and are installing foam insulation and dry wall on the ceiling.  

Tonight we have the Jr High students form the neighborhood for worship and devotionals that were created by are students, so be in prayer for them tonight.  Also, we GET TO TAKE SHOWERS!!! Yaaaayyyyyyyy!!!!!  Then we get to play indoor basefootball that was created last night, don't worry, y0u'll get to see it on YouTube when we get home.  

I'll blog later tonight to let you know how it's going.  

We made it in safe and sound around 7pm tonight.  We were briefed about what to expect and what's around us and we met all the people we are working with.  Everyone is in a great mood and we're getting settled in as good as we can, sleeping arrangements are a little tight, BUUUT, we' ll be fine with the girls on the fourth and third floors and the guys on the 2nd.  We were broken up into teams to do different jobs tomorrow, some will be cooking, some will be tutoring elementary kids, and others will be doing various jobs around the church building.  

It's going to be....not easy....but I'm pretty sure we'll be fine.  OF COURSE KAITIE AND KENZIE ARE PLAYING TWIN JOKES ON THE NEW PEOPLE!!!  

Well, breakfast is at 730 tomorrow :( but at least Adam and myself have nice soft couches to sleep on :) 

I'll upload some pics tomorrow, my new camera is being stupid.

In 2 1/2 days we leave for Cincinnati to work at the State Ave. Church of Christ for a week.  I'm excited about this week as always, but I also know the seriousness of leading 25 high school students on a mission trip and just how important and crucial this is.  

We have...

1 week for us to grow together. 

1 week for us to reach out.

1 week for us to allow God to move in us as we do something different.  (knowing God moves when we're home as well) 

I week to get away from school and the worries at home to focus on others and on Christ.

It's when we're away, together, serving, this is when it gets good, this is when it's hard and uncomfortable.   When we have to work together and act above our age, which is not out of the realm for teenagers, and definitely not our teenagers.  

It's always awesome to see students rise to being challenged, to work together in situations that are out of their comfort zones.  Also, you can track our progress, I'm planning on blogging about what goes on every night beginning Sunday, so check it out.  It's gonna be good...

Sometimes things don't work out like we planned.

Have a great weekend everybody!!!

I had an absolutely awesome day yesterday, one reason was because it was 73 degrees and I put 200+ miles on my motorcycle, but for the most part, it was because of the 4 people I spent time with.

1) I ate lunch at Steak and Shake with Chip, who is a great friend and a great minister of the Gospel of Christ.  We went to college together and even though he's 15 years older than I am, because of Christ, we have a bond.  And because of this bond, we have friendship and brotherhood.  It was great catching up, talking about school times, life now, and our plans.  Chip's a great guy and is always an encouragement to me.

2) At 5 I met with Kim at a coffee shop downtown, Kim is a high school senior who has an unbelievable passion for God and a joy that is unmistakeable.  We talked about her plans and what she wants to do with her life and I was amazed at her maturity and that God would allow me to teach someone like her.  There are so many times when I'm with students that I feel so unworthy of being able to do my job.  So unworthy to influence students with such a wide-open horizon, it's just amazing.  After leaving Kim, I was so encouraged by what God is doing , not only in her life and mine, but what God is doing in general.  Yeah, this world is filled with pain, yeah there's hurt, but it's times like these that I'm reminded of the Remedy.  That I'm reminded of the imperfections of His people and that He loves us the same.  I just wonder what it would be like had I been encouraged and had I chosen to live my high school life like Kim...

3) After leaving the coffee shop I went, met Adam, and we rode our motorcycles to Lexington to Buffalo Wild Wings, after all, it was 40 cent wing night!!!  With Adam I have one of my closest friends who pursues God, a friend who tries his best to be a good husband and a good dad, someone I relate to on every level, who encourages me in more ways than he knows.  Someone who is a brother in Christ and a partner in ministry. We share the same struggles (although his wife is wwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy crazier), the same goals, so there's a sameness there.  I know with Adam I can say anything, we can talk about things because we are in the same place in life.  Adam's the friend that I never really had for so many years and I am so blessed to have that in my life.  

4) I came home to the most beautiful...er...scratch that...the most freakingly hottest woman in the world.  It was late, so she was already in bed, she's a great mom and works hard at it so she was tired. It's such a joy to lay down beside her and sleep, knowing how much she loves me even though I'm moody at times, silly most of the time, and hide behind corners and try to scare her every chance I can.  I am in absolute love with my wife, I'm so thankful that she's in my life.  She puts up with me, takes care of me, is a partner in the student ministry, and does other things of which I will not speak of ;).  I love being here in our little house that's not in the best part of town, but it's home, it's where she is, its where WE are. 

Days like yesterday make all the other days worth it, the days when my body aches, the days when I gut out 3 miles, the days when I screw up, the days when someone does something that hurts, the days when I try to help pick up the pieces, the days when life happens.  I hope that everyone can have someone in their life, someone like one of these 4.  A partner, and encourager, a confidant, and someone who's learning from you and with you.  I hope that we take the time to seek these relationships, that we seek what God has to offer to us, which is why I believe Church is so important.  That's where these relationships, these right relationships are ripe for the picking.  

Houses at Night

Maybe it's because I'm A.D.D. (had to put the periods in because it looked like I was trying to scream the word 'add' to you.) or something, I really don't know, but when I'm driving, I look at stuff.  

Sure, I watch the road and avoid pot holes and other cars, but I like to see what's around me, what's going on, and how many dead animals there are on the side of the road.  

But there's something about being out at night...you know...when you're out really late on into the early morning.  There's little traffic, everything seems quiet, everything is just...asleep.  

A couple of weeks ago as I was driving home from the Cincinnati Airport at 4AM, my mind began to wonder as I drove down the interstate passing hundreds of houses spread along the road.  I started thinking, what is it like in those homes?  Is it a happy place?  Is a place of torment and frustration?  Is it full of love or full of torment and hurt?  

These questions don't hit me at day, but only at night, when the lights are off, or maybe a bathroom light is on.  And I don't know why, but my heart went out to all of these houses I passed and I kept thinking, I hope everyone is ok in there.  

There's not much I can do for the people in the houses I passed I suppose, I guess technically I could drive back up there during the day, ring the door bell, and ask whoever answers if they are ok.  Only to hear some little kid scream "STRANGER DANGER" and send some huge dog with equally huge teeth after me.  But that's not logical I suppose.

What is logical, is for me to check and make sure my house is ok, and to check the people around me that I love, that their houses are ok.  Ask my neighbors and check and see if their houses are ok, hopefully inspiring and training others to do the same. 

One thing my personality lacked growing up was a word called 'compassion' coupled with the words 'for others.'  Just not something I developed, but now that I've experienced it, both toward me and me to others, it's interesting.  

Interesting because it hurts when you find hurt, it's awesome when you come across joy, it's humbling when it's directed toward you, encouraging by love, and discouraging by the pain.  Many times, all of this happens all at once, which makes us a little crazy.  

Compassion, it is worth us giving up our comfort to show, to give, to receive.  It's worth us taking an interest in others, to see if they are ok.  It's worth our time, energy, and it's worth our stress levels.  Compassion was shown to us through Christ, now it's our turn to show it to others through our lives.   

The Other Night

This kind of sounds like some sort of title to a cheesy horror movie doesn't it?  Let's say it together in that scary voice...THE OTHER NIGHT!  Yeah that was stupid.  

But seriously, the other night I had to drive a bus load of people to the Cincinnati airport, they had to be there before 5AM, which meant we had to leave Danville by 2:30AM.  Now, I don't stay up very late anymore, I used to as a college guy watching 3 showings of Sportcenter, but not so much anymore.  But, I will have to admit, I was kind of excited about the whole thing, the thought of being out all night long still has that ring to it doesn't it?  

The trip up was uneventful, just a bunch of sleeping people on the bus, my i-pod on my ears, and a bright moon and clear sky.  After I dropped them off I headed back alone on the bus, still dark, still the moon, still my i-pod, and a cup of root beer.  I don't know why, but the moon light coming in the bus through the windows and on to me absolutely calmed me.  Maybe it was the mystery, maybe it was the fact that I was 'out all night,' or maybe something deeper.  

Maybe it's simply how the moon is...well hopefully...just like you and me.  I stared at the moon probably a little too long on that ride home, ignoring the fact that I had lost count of the deer I'd seen on the side of the road.  But I couldn't stop thinking about how the light of the moon isn't produced by the moon itself, but it's the reflection of the sun.  

Am I a good moon?  What light am I reflecting?  If I moon you I'm pretty sure it'd be just as white...but we'll stay away from that topic.  

David Crowder wrote a song about this very thing and how just as the moon reflects the light of the sun in the dark night, we too need to reflect the light of Christ in this dark world.  Not in a way that confuses people with how we act at different times, but makes people want to see what's on the other side, what's that light bouncing off of us.  

What do you reflect?     

I'm STUCK...but...

The weather's bad and my stomach is very upset, so I'm stuck and I'll pretty much let you guess which one is worse.  But how hard is it when we're stuck in life, stuck by circumstances, stuck by decisions that were made a looooonnng time ago, and even stuck by decisions made by other people?  That's how I feel way more than I probably should, I just feel stuck.  

I think there are way more people in this world and in our communities who feel stuck than those who don't.  

That statement makes me think, why?  Why are we stuck?  Why are we not enjoying freedom in Christ and freedom in our nation?  Why do we keep sticking ourselves?  But isn't that what it comes down to?  I think it comes down to hurt, to hurt keeping us from leaving, hurt keeping us from staying, hurt keeping us from our God, hurt making us look anywhere but the Remedy.

I took the above picture on an extremely enjoyable time, I was asked to speak at a retreat in Michigan by a friend of mine and I snapped this shot while driving through North Central Indiana.  This picture represents something, something so important when we're stuck, so important when we're stuck in those dark times of life.  So important when we can't pay the bills, when we are hurt beyond belief, when we're wondering why our marriage is going the way it is...it represents...daylight.  

There's an awesome song by an obscure band named Remedy Drive that says...

"Has everything you counted on left you right here, with no warning.

Have your dreams become invisible, wait with me dear, until the morning.

Light will make the night burn out.

Hold on, daylight is coming."  

What if this daylight doesn't come soon?   What if we are still stuck when we wake up in the morning?  What if when I finally do get to sleep at night, the first thing I feel when I wake up is the same hurt?  

John 16:33 Jesus tells us, "In this world you WILL have trouble, but take heart, I HAVE OVERCOME THE WORLD." 

I think all we can do is simply...hold on.  When we do, when we pursue, it's amazing what happens to the stuck.

 

Stay, piles of fire, a cow, and a polar bear dog.

Name this song!!!  It starts with a sweet high voice and says...

"You say, I only hear what want to.

You say I talk so all the time.

And I thought what I felt was simple,

and I thought that I don't belong,

and now that I am leaving,

now I know that I did something wrong 'cause I missed you.

Yeah yeah, I missed you."  

Did you get it?  

Of course you did, it's 'Stay' by Lisa Loeb and at the risk of losing my man-card, it is one of the greatest songs of all time in my humble opinion.  Why, you may asked in that annoyed tone?  Well, because it's...so...me.  Let me explain...

After our youth service we call Sunday Night Alive (and have for years church across the street that stole our name...I think it's funny) and since the next day was MLK day and everything was closed, a whole bunch of us went to our favorite Mexican restaurant named Guadalajara to eat.  It was a good time of hanging out and chatting, but these things always come to an end and then it's time to go home.  

I gave some friends rides to their places of sleeping and one of them lives waaaaaaaaayyyyy out in the country and this is where it gets interesting.  

It was really snowy that night for KY, which means there was an inch or so and the roads were covered.  We were talking and having a good time when I said, "there's animal tracks in the road."  And then continued to ramble about the animal tracks that were still in the road.  I rambled SO much that I kinda remember Cheyenne (who was sitting in the front passenger seat) gasp, but it didn't register with me that she said, "COW!"  Well...until I saw the big cow butt right in front of us.  Of course the road is covered in snow, I can't brake, I can't swerve, so I just manage to miss the cow as it cowed it's way on down the road (some awesome driving skills I may add).  

You ever noticed that as people we can 'talk so all the time,' that we can miss things, leave, not leave, make the wrong choices and it's just not right?  

We can drift away from the fist love (if we developed it) of the Remedy and next thing we know, it's not right and we miss Him.  Maybe it's time we listen, it's time to reevaluate our situation, because like Lisa's song, it's loud we can hear and it is that simple.

Life Ends

 "What if my love was loud, sharing this joy I've found?  Could hearts refrain from giving praise? What if I followed You, knowing You'd see me through?  Would I have anything to fear?  Cause there must be more than this!  Yes, there's something more than this!!!!!!"  

  This is the opening from an awesome worship song written by Matt McCoy, this song speaks directly to what I'm thinking, directly to the point that I'm at in life.  I absolutely love this song!!!

  I was with 3 friends tonight, we went to watch some Jr. High girls play in an indoor soccer game (which is surprisingly entertaining) and we decided that since there was a Steak-N-Shake near by, we'd eat there.  After dinner we had to get on good 'ol I-75 for a quick jaunt as we had to go to the other side of town.  As I was merging on to the interstate (yes, I ALWAYS drive Kaely) there was a tremendously large truck in the right lane, and not being very familiar with Richmond, KY, I thought my lane continued to the next exit...well...it pretty much didn't.  I said, 'Holy crap, lane ends here."  To which Ty, who was sitting in the front passenger seat replied, 'Life ends here.'  Which was kind of funny to me.  

And got me thinking about our song by Matt McCoy.

"Help me to stand.  Help me be real.  Help me feel the wounds you feel.  What would it take for this heart to break  for You?  I longing to be, I'm willing to find deeper meaning in this life."  

How awesome would it be if we all lived in a way that we stood, that we were real with God, ourselves and each other.  If we saw the hurt, if our hearts broke for stuff that matters?  Could you actually imagine if everyone who claimed to be a follower of Jesus actually did these things?  If money, sports, our jobs just weren't as important as following our Creator?  Even death and sickness would no longer have the hold it does on us because it just wouldn't hurt as bad.  That we live to the point that when we die, when it's time for us to go, we've brought and added to the fame of Christ?  

The bridge of this song says: "What if my pride fell down?  Releasing of this crown.  Would I reflect the Grace You give?"  

And I LOVE the next part because it encourages US to take control of our situations, to get up from the hurt, from the mistakes...from the pain.  It says, "What if I took a stand, raising the flag again?  Could I be used to bring You fame?"

The answer is of course...YES!   There's so much more to this life, so much more to what's right before us, so much more than money, family, friends, EVERYTHING!!!  

WHO'S WILLING TO FIND THE DEEPER MEANING? 

1920

 I went to a birthday party for my grandmother last night, she turned 89.  Now, I know there's been lots and lots and lots of people who have lived longer and there are people who are older, but just think about that for a second...89.  Granny, was born in 1920...19...20.  

 As we were driving, I was thinking about all that my Granny has seen, all that's gone on in her lifetime.  She was born at the end of WWI, went through WWII, Korea, Vietnam.  She lived through the great depression and Granny saw the beginning of the struggle between Israel and the Palestinians.  Granny saw Charles Manson, Jim Jones, the rise and fall of Communism, and the murder of millions upon millions by people such as Hitler AND Pol Pot.  

 Notice what all I mentioned that she saw?  That's a lot of Negative, that's so much pain and torment and hurt.  How many people have been hurt? How many children have died of hunger?how many innocent young girls have been raped and sold into slavery?  How many?  

 Why is it that there is so much negative that outweighs the positive?  Why is it that we are seeing these things overshadow the things of Righteousness?  

 It's fairly simple I guess, it's the whole wide and narrow are the roads thing isn't?  

So what should we do?  Sit and watch or do something...anything?  The sad part is, my Granny doesn't have much longer, she's as healthy as an 89 year-old can be, but she's 89, and we don't live forever.  What if one person, you or me decides we're going to try to change a life?  We're going to talk to that kid down the street who's parents just split?  Would that be worth our time?  Would that be worth giving up some overtime or leaving work early or not watching the game?  

You decide.  But let me ask this.  How much hurt have you seen, does it bother you?  

Ugh...my little girl is sick.  It's not bad sick or sick that she won't get over, in fact, my wife texted me and said she's feeling much better today.  She said she's bored...she's like me I suppose, can't sit still.  My wife asked her if she wanted to go to the movies this afternoon so she could get out, and she said no because she 'wants to wait until her mouth feels better so she can eat popcorn.'  She is totally my kid.  

But last night was no fun at all, she has some virus and it makes her throat very, very sore.  We were trying to look into her mouth with a lamp (because not one of our 53 flashlights have working batteries due to my son making them 'trains') and it made her freak.  She screamed, squirmed, covered her mouth with her hands, and when my wife got her finger in her mouth, she bit it!  Which is crazy, because my daughter is the sweetest most helpful 3 year old I've ever known.  She was that desperate to avoid anything, especially those doing something to try to help her.  

Trying to help?  Did she not realize that we were trying to help?  That we were trying to see what the problem does so we could gibe her a Remedy (thanks David Crowder)?  I mean she did everything to avoid and stop this...this...Remedy.

This morning I had to drive to Mercer Senior High School to speak at FCA because one of the most unbelievably awesome teens I have met in my life asked me to do it.  As I was driving to school (still has a dreadful ring to it doesn't it?) through the snow, I started thinking about our adventure last night and just how close the situation with my daughter and my situation with God mirrors each other.

Look at it like this, God offers us the Remedy, freely...plainly.  But yet we scream, squirm, cover our mouths, and even bite to keep from taking it or letting it do anything with us.  I wonder how many times I've mad God think, 'Justin, don't you know I'm trying to HELP?'  'I know it tastes yuckie, I know it hurts, I know you don't want to give up this or that, but this is the Remedy, and the Remedy is best.'

The time has come for the people like me to stop pursuing the things that do not matter.  Because the Remedy is here, the Remedy is now, the Remedy is free, and the Remedy doesn't care...it just wants to heal.

funny

One of my favorite movie lines is an obscure quote from the movie Tombstone which starred Kurt Russell and Val Kilmer.  The movie is a loose, and I mean LOOOOOOSE interpretation for Wyatt Earp's escapades in death and destruction in Tombstone, AZ.  There's a point where Doc Holiday (Val Kilmer) is dying of tuberculosis and Wyatt (Kurt Russell) visits him.  Wyatt gives Doc some sort of certificate that states that Doc and Wyatt are friends, which is significant because Doc didn't really have any friends.  As Wyatt leaves Doc for the last time, Doc looks at his feet and before he dies he says, 'This is funny."  

It's such a weird scene, why is that in there, why is that funny?  What's even more 'funny' is that today I learned that one of the girls who used to babysit me when I was little passed away....2 years ago!  Yes, she passed away 2 years ago!  And even better, I haven't seen her for probably 16 years.  I don't know why this struck me, maybe because she was the one who introduced me to U2 when the Joshua Tree first came out.  Maybe because the memories of her and me and listening to U2 represented something.  Like the day she picked me, my brother, and her brother up from the movies after we saw Space Balls, that was the time we tried to construct our own towers of Babel from straws, and we drove home, listening to U2.  

Maybe it's just that I've hit a certain point in life, that I want what matters to really matter. Maybe how if I had it all to do over again, I'd still listen to U2 and I definitely would have seen Space Balls, but maybe I'd have spent more time getting ready for the things that do matter.  Enjoying the things that are gone, that I had no idea would leave at that point.  So I guess the question is, are we participating in the things that matter?  Are we giving God the chance to blow our minds?  Are we thinking, wow, the now will be gone and who knows how long those who are close to us have left.  

Thanks Lela, for introducing me to U2, you were right, they are 'cool.'

The first one....

Blogs are stupid, so therefore I love them.  I pretty much do whatever my beard tells me to do, at least that's my excuse.  How often is that our reasoning for decisions that we make?  Well...'I'm not sure about why' or 'I really don't know what to do here'... so I'll just do whatever.  

 The simple reality is that there is a God who is there before us, who is with us and offers us wisdom through His Word and people He's put in our lives.  I work with students, and man they are so awesome, and yet I'm amazed at how resilient some of them are.  I mean, to go through what they have to go through and yet with child-like faith, they come out the other side.  Maybe a little bruised and scratched, but out the other side never the less.

What happened to that when we got older?  Why is it when things fall apart or go crazy our first order of business is to look everywhere else?  Is it because we are wiser?  Or have we just been influenced and conditioned by our American Dream?