motorcycles at night

There's something mysterious about riding a motorcycle late at night.  Not riding it around in the city, but out in the country, under the stars, away from the lights of the city and other cars.  It's a feeling of alone that you don't get very often and I don't mean that in a bad way (like in the type of 'alone' that was my high school career).  But it's just you, a bike, and the road.  

I was out real late the other night on a 2 lane road way out in the country, and I noticed something.  There was a weird movement in my visor and it took me a second to figure out what I was looking at.  See, the light of my head light caused a reflection on the inside of my helmet's visor, and when I figured it out, it was my own eyes that I was seeing.  I literally had to look through the reflection of my eyes in my visor to see the road.  I thought that was very weird, weird that I was looking at myself and into my own eyes, and it made me think.  It made me think that sometimes I really don't like what's on the other side of them.  

That sometimes selfish and pride are staring right back at me.  That holding on to past hurts, struggles and anger keep peering at me and they just won't go away.  I didn't like having to look into my own eyes that night, I didn't like the fact of peeking at my own soul and personality was something that was brought on.  I wanted to flip up my visor, but that visor protected me from the wind and the torrent of bugs that were assaulting me.  I needed the visor, I needed what it was made for, so I could see and be safe.  

We need to investigate ourselves, we need to peer into our own lives, motives, judgements, and salvation.  We need the Word of God to be our visor, our protector, our windshield, our tool to truth and our souls.  We need to spend time peering into these things, pondering the things we could do better and taking comfort in the things we are doing right.  We need reflection.  

Please take time this week and reflect, take time this week to investigate your own soul and where you stand based upon the truth found in the Word of God.  Take time to peer, take time to search and if you can...take time to ride a motorcycle.   

A couple of years ago we decided to pony up $200 or so and buy one of those Hoover carpet cleaners, and let me tell you, it's been worth every penny.  

Here's the thing, I don't really consider us dirty people.  Sloppy?  Sure.  Dirty?  No.  I mean, I personally tend to tip the scale on the side of 'pretty disgusting individual,'  but as a whole, I'd like to think we're fairly clean folks.  

With that being said, all I have to say is if you clean you're own carpet, then nothing and I mean NOTHING will make you feel more disgusting than when you empty the container of the used water out.  It is nothing but lower Mississippi River water and it makes you wonder how in the world could your carpet be so dirty?  

But it's easy actually when you think about it.  There's 4 of us in our household and we are in and out all day long.  Walking in the grass, down the road, at school, at work, in the car, in the yard, in the store, you name it, where on it.  Just think of all the stuff that attaches to the bottom of our shoes, all the dirt and grime that is tracked in from the outside world, all the junk, the undesirable dirt.  

But isn't that like our hearts?  We have the opportunity to purify ourselves from the outside world, and God allows us to do so.  Once we have He no longer sees our sins, but there are consequences for our choices and our actions. 

Many times we track things inside of us, we walk through a song, a tv show, something online, or a thought and we track the things we want out right back in.  Heck, sometimes we straight up walk through the cow pasture looking for things to step in, and when we find them, we roll in them.  We allow ourselves to be consumed and dirtied by the desires of our hearts and the shiny things of the world.  

But yet God is steadfast, cleaning us, as 1 John tells us, continuing to purify us from our sins, our unrighteousness, from the things we track into our hearts.  

Because of this, isn't it time to live up to our end of the relationship?  Isn't it time we pursue the things of God and avoid the dirt and grim?  Of course we'll never ever be perfect, in fact, God has never said or demanded we be perfect.  But God does require our very best effort and because of this free GIFT of grace and mercy, it's time to avoid those things that soil us.  

So may God lead you and guide you through times of temptation and frustration this week at home, work, or school.  May we have a week with clean carpets.  

what does that have to do with anything?

This is my friend.  Yeah, I know it's not a huge Harley and is only a 750cc Honda, but I love it!  For one because it isn't a Harley Davidson therefore it won't breakdown on me constantly, but mainly because it brings me great joy and great relief from stress.  With this it's the one thing that has ever made me 'semi-cool' I suppose.    

It also means so much to me because it was given to me by people that I love very dearly, a gift just because, a gift that I wouldn't change, well...except for new pipes someday.  I have enjoyed this bike so much that I've put over 5000 miles on it in less than a year.  That's a lot of miles for a bike considering it pretty much sat covered by a tarp from November to March.  

So here's this gift, this thing that someone gave me that brings me joy and comfort.  A gift that saves me money on gas, a gift that makes me look better, a gift that gives me yet one more reason to grow my goatee really long.  A gift that makes me realize that I really don't deserve something like this, trust me.  

Earlier today I was washing my gift, because I've never had a nice new car and this is literally the only thing I've owned that's worth keeping up, and it was covered with bugs because like I said, I ride the crap out of it.  Anyway, I was washing it today and I don't know if you've ever tried to wash a motorcycle but it's not very easy.  There's all the nooks and crannies, all the different parts, and all the wonderful chrome, add all that up and it takes quite a while.  

But after I was done washing my gift and polishing all the chrome, I stood back and looked at it.  Right there I realized that it was worth the time and effort to wash it, it was worth the energy to polish it right and to make it gleam.  It was worth it because I really, really like my gift.  It was worth it because someone gave that to me and without saying I owe it to them to keep it up nice, keeping it nice shows my appreciation and care for my gift. 

Right there I realized that my gift isn't unlike my free gift of grace from God.  That because He did what He did for me, I love Him for that.  And I am so thankful for what He did for me, that my outpouring of thankfulness and love for God's gift makes me want to polish it.  Makes me want to spend time on it, makes me want to keep it from places that will soil it.  

I realized that as hard as it is to keep my bike clean, it's harder to keep myself clean and pure.  It's harder to keep my desires from interfering with this love relationship that I have with my Creator and I have to work at keeping my Gift pure, polished, and to maintain its growth.  

So many of us believe that to have a relationship with Christ is to accept Him, attend church or at least an Easter service and we're good.  But if you believe, if I believe that all of this is real, don't you think it's worth our time to polish and clean?  Don't you think it's worth our effort to keep our minds and hearts pure?  Don't you think it's worth pursuing with all that we have?  I mean if this is real, it's God and that leaves us with 2 choices...all or nothing.  

I'm so thankful for my Gift from God and for what He has done, is doing, and will do in my life.  I'm also very thankful for my friends that have brought me so much joy from their gift to me.  

best i can

Have you ever heard a song and just have it kick you right in the heart?  Like wow, that song is just all about me right now and it's...just inspiring.  

Certain songs through my life really stick out to me, some because of what they say, others because of the time period of my life that was defined by the song.  Songs like 'Where the Streets have No Name' by U2, 'What if' by Matt McCoy, 'Walking in Memphis' by Marc Cohn, 'Sweet Child O' Mine' by Guns n Roses, anything off of Def Leppard's Hysteria album, 'Evenflow' by Pearl Jam, Audio Adrenaline's 'Big House' and 'Bag Lady,' 'Meet with Me' from Ten Shekel Shirt, 'Beautiful Collision' by David Crowder Band and 

'Dancing Queen' by ABBA...oh...did I say that out loud?  

The other day I received a copy of Decyfer Down's new album 'Crash.'  Decyfer Down is a band from Morehead City, NC and I'd describe them as 80's hair metal crashed into Soundgarden plus modernity.  Needless to say, I loved them right off the bat.  

But they have a song that got me, a song that describes where I feel I am right now.   The song is called best I can and here are some of the lyrics...

Been thinking about
All those lies you heard me say
I can't make them go away
Been thinking about 
All those mistakes you've seen me make

When I can barely hold on 
You promise me you won't let me go 
And I want you to know

I don't live a perfect life
But God knows I'm trying the best I can
And I have wasted so much time
Pretending I'm alright about who I am
But now I'm living the best I can

Been thinking about
It's hard to see what you see in me
Would you lay it out for me?
Been thinking about
This isn't the way I thought I would be

When I can barely hold on 
You promise me you won't let me go 
And I want you to know

I don't live a perfect life
But God knows I'm trying the best I can
And I have wasted so much time
Pretending I'm alright about who I am
But now I'm living the best I can

Oh yeah I know, I'm supposed to have everything together right?  To that I'm saying, I'm trying, I'm a work in progress too.  

All of us are works in progress...works in progresses...workses is progressionses...you know what I mean.  We are all either on  some point in the same journey or are still at the starting line yet to start, with others who have fallen off the path.  God never expected Christians to be amazingly perfect once we accepted His Son, BUT He does expect that we live the for Him, that we make progress, that we do the best we can.  That we seek Him, His will, His lifestyle, His glory through what we are doing and how we are living. 

Through all the times and all the mistakes I have made and will make, I know there's grace and I'm so thankful for that.  I know there's healing and restoration and I'm so thankful for that.  I know there's love and compassion and I'm so thankful for that.  But because of that, there has to be a response with our lives.  Our response has to be, at worst, to do the best we can, to grow, to learn, to change.   

Are you doing the best you can?  Why don't you join me as a work in progress, we'll get there...

helpless?

I'll admit it, I've felt pretty helpless more than once in my life.  There's times when I wish I could open my Mac and it had a help button to get me through decisions and the things that I'm not sure are going to work out.  

I can remember being 9 years old and riding my bike down a long steep hill, at the bottom of the hill were 2 choices (because stopping isn't a choice to a 9 year old boy of course) 1) keep going straight into the busiest road in Jackson, TN; 0r 2) turn right at the bottom of the hill.  I chose number 2 of course but there was no way I was making the turn, so instead of washing out or making it, I hit the curb going very fast causing me to flip over and over ultimately landing on my face.  I bloodied my nose, bent up my bike, hurt my pride, but I was otherwise ok.  

I remember when I was 12, my best friends mom was murdered.  She was straight up shot in the head while she was in bed.  He called me when he found out crying, saying his mom was dead, his mom was dead, that she was shot.  Like any good friend, at first I didn't believe him, but it didn't take long for me to realize he wasn't playing.  Now what does a 7th grader do, sitting in his room on the phone with his best friend on the other line crying uncontrollably about his murdered mom?  I remember sitting there listening to him sob and sob and sob and sob for about an hour.  Every so often I'd say, 'I'm so sorry,' but I  was helpless and he was my best friend.  There was nothing I could say or nothing I could do, but sit there...sit there with him on the phone. 

So many times people see something and it hurts them, or their hearts are in line with God's heart and the very thing that hurts God also hurts them.  But most choose to do...nothing.  

I've thought often about that night on the phone with my best friend for the last 20 years, and I realize I did about the only thing I could have at the time.  That was listen and being there, and don't get me wrong and think that I was some super mature Christ-loving kid at that time because my life was anything but Christ-loving until I was about 20.  The only reason I stayed with him was because I simply didn't know what else to do, and he needed someone to be there. I guess I should have made my parents take me to his house, I guess I should have had him come over, but I just listened.

Do you have those situations?  Do you look out at this world and become pained by the things you see, the people you come in contact with?  Is it enough to hurt for them and do nothing?  I don't think it is enough.  

We are called to do something, to live outside of our own little houses with leaky roofs, we are called to try, even if we don't know what to do.  Sometimes us just being there is enough to start with, sometimes the situation calls for more.  

But I just don't want to go through my life working without reaching out to others, without bringing the Remedy to those who are hurt.  Even if we don't have the words, even if we don't know what to do, simply try.

Football, poopie pants, bumper cars, and cracks...

Today was supposed to be THE perfect day, and it was great, but I'm a negative nelly so I let stuff overshadow reality.  Let me explain...

Today was MAN DAY, a day when my 6 year old son, Zeke and I planned to go to the Blue/White football game at the University of Kentucky.  He had a soccer game this morning, then after that we were going to jet off to Lexington, but things came unglued from the get go.  

Zeke is actually really good at soccer, and this isn't dad talk, I personally despise the wretched sport but he is like...good.  I mean, he's scored 8 goals in his first 3 games good and the coach said he should play with the older age group good.  Which is strange because Gillespies tend to be 'ok' or at best above average at a sport.  But I missed the first part of his game due to issues that came up inside my body from last nights dinner (this is foreshadowing by the way).  But hey, we can over come that.

So before I get to the bad parts of the day, let me give you a recap of the great parts of the day, and it was great.  We had a blast at Commonwealth Stadium!!!  I actually heard Micah Johnson, UK's stud linebacker, yell boom before he lit up a running back, it was so cool.  I also was able to get fairly close to Coach Calipari and Patrick Patterson before they were whisked away, but that's ok too.  

Zeke and I watched trains, we came home and played basketball outside (he won 102-95), we mowed the yard, which is awesome because he gets an old stroller, puts his ipod on like me and goes behind me as I'm mowing.  Then, to top it off, we played catch until dark when mean ol' mommy made us come inside.  So you can see the awesomeness that was my day, now for the parts that I can't shake. 

1) Remember my hinting of my meal last night?  Well...I pooped my pants when we got into Lexington.  Yes...I did.  Now before you make fun of me...you've done it too so shuttie.  Normally that would be funny to me, but not so much today.  I mean it was me and Zeke, and we were being boys and doing boy things and trying to gross each other out and all, then I had a 'toot' that wasn't what it lead my brain to believe it was...

2) I rear ended a brand spanking new Toyota Camery on our way into Commonwealth Stadium.  I hit it pretty hard and they had a little kid in the car too, it really was bad.  I expected the people to come pouring out of the car and I decided I was just going to take it.  But they were cool, no police called, just exchanged info.  I put a dent in the bumper and shoved the nose of my car back into the rest of it, so now I can't get my hood open.  So just add that to the electrical problems that have claimed my turn signals and randomly lights up my dash and causes my tape player (yes, tape player) to rewind.  And add it to my window that stays up with zip ties, my cracked heater core, driver door that's coming apart, heater fan that works when it feels like it, and rear door that CRACKLES when it is opened and closed.  So I'm expecting the call anytime now...

3) One of my most used possessions is my i-pod, I use it all the time for all kinds of things and situations, well...after the poo and after the crash, I dropped it and put many cracks in the screen.  These cracks aren't on the outside of the screen either, they're on the inside.  But hey, it still works so we shall soldier on.  

Notice how things like this happens, we have something awesome and wonderful planned, but then crap happens.  Then we, or I, focus on the negatives, rather than the positives.  Poop cleans, no one was hurt in the other car or mine, and ipods aren't anything.  But the day I had with my son will hopefully be forever.  

Jesus promised us 2 things in John 16:33: 1) In this world we WILL have trouble.  2) Take heart HE has overcome the world.  

He's here, He's the remedy, He desires us, He will provide and He will protect if we allow Him to do these things for us.  

May your Sunday and work week be filled with joy even though your pants are full of...well...not joy...

Compassion, Horses, and Earth Day

There's a couple of things that have really struck me in an awkward way here recently.

1) Earth Day: Now I'll have to admit that I've never been too fond of the 'holiday' or it's meaning.  The celebration of the creation is just not something that I think to highly of as a follower of Christ.  Why in the world (haha, get it?) would we waste our time?  

  Now don't get me wrong, I am a firm believer in taking care of and being a good steward to the resources we have been given by God to use.  I am a supporter of recycling materials.  I am a supporter of alternate means of energy other than oil for many reasons.  I am also a supporter of conservation in the saving of land and taking care of animals, BUT, there has to be some common sense.  

   Take the whales and polar bears and their possible extinction.  In Matthew 10, Jesus was teaching about the importance of people and the importance of people living for Him and being focused on Him.  He was also teaching us to not worry about those who can hurt us when we are doing His work.  Yes, He lets us know it's hard, but the focus is, 'He is more important.'  In vs. 29-31 He says...

  "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?  yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.  And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  So don't be afraid, you are worth more than many sparrows."

  Of course the context of this entire chapter is the importance of people and basically the focus of where people should be.  However, we can learn that God is aware of when any animal dies and specifically, their deaths are in the will of the Father.  God knew when and why all of the T-Rex's died.  God was there for the dodo birds.  God chose to let the wooley mammoths die out as well.

  For those of us with bleeding hearts we say, "That's cruel, what kind of God does that?"  To that I say, one that knows what He's doing.  If the Blue Whale and the Polar Bear become extinct, it will not be apart from the will of the Father.  

  If we believe that God has done all He has done and is as powerful as He is, then I'm certain He will take care of His creation.  

2) This week 21 polo horses in Florida died a mysterious death as a result of supplements that were mixed wrong.  Because I live outside of "The Horse Capital of the World," Lexington, KY, people are going crazy.  Crying, having memorial services, clamoring for justice for these horses and wanting to get to the bottom of their deaths.  The outrage for this is amazing!!!

  This saddens me greatly, not the death of the horses, sure, it's bad, but where's the outrage toward injustice of people?  Where's the outrage to human sex trafficking?  Where's the outrage for hungry children?  Where's the outrage toward abortion?  Where's the outrage to abuse?  Why are these people wanting to get to the bottom of this issue, but is not concerned that there are people all over the world in poverty?  How come vet clinics have ultra-sound machines but clinics for people all over the world do not?  

  There is definitely something wrong here.  God had given us tremendous opportunities to share His will, but we waste so much time and so many resources on so many things that do not really matter.  It's time to stop wasting what matters, a chance to share the Gospel, a chance to save a live, a chance for God to make your life count.  

Maybe start here, we have...  www.compassion.com